walker, texas ranger

I'm being lazy again, and linking you to someone else's blog so you dont have to read mine. This time it's Elizabeth. Her blog is pretty neat, she was actually the inspiration for me to make this blog. Also, she has business cards for her blog and that's way cool. Pay close attention to her latest couple of posts, I'll link you to one in particular that you should all enjoy, you free spirits you.

SEX.

Pretty cheeky, huh?

shigeru miyamoto

So it's been over a week since I posted last, and I honestly have no excuses. I finished uni and have hardly been working, I've just been lazy. And I don't think there's anyway to beat it. I blame Shigeru Miyamoto. Miyamoto created the Mario series, the Zelda series, the Donkey Kong series, the Star Fox series and the Pikmin series. What a pain in the ass for people like me who already struggle to find motivation. But I love him so much. He's such a charmer, look at him and tell me you think he's a bad guy. I've spent the majority of my life playing games that he's created. Every one of his games is so well crafted, and full of the most imaginative worlds, you cant help but idolise him.

I know that sounds super geeky, but the amount of effort this man puts into his games is ridiculous. He creates a whole universe and leaves no character bland, and rewards the old fans with character revivals in every game. He also cross references other games in his games. Mario references in Zelda games, Pikmin in Mario games. Over half the Smash Bros. roster are filled with characters he created!

Pikmin! His latest creation

He's a pretty cool dude, and I know you've all played Mario at least once in your life so appreciate him!

amateurs

It's a friday afternoon so I'm going to be lazy and post another one of my stories. This was recently published in a book of short stories (Verandah 26 is the name of the book, Google it you want but I don't get any profit - not that that's why I write...), but you can read it here for free! I hope you enjoy it, It's one of my favourites! Even though I wrote the word Amateurs like a thousand times, I still cant spell it right... stupid English language.

Amateurs...

tina fey: my heroin(e)

Where would I be in life without television? I know it's the box that rots your imagination, but I wont convince any of you that I don't watch TV. When I was younger the only show I had interest in was Home and Away. I stand by my theory that you know you've met a nice boy or girl when you find out they watched Home and Away, it should have brought them up just nicely. And if they tell you they cried when Noah died, marry them. I cried when Noah died. There are so many television shows that I watch these days, but none on TV, I spend hundreds of dollars a month on DVDs. I know that I should be anti-television, because it's killing my industry, but I am starting to embrace it just as another form of writing. For example, 30 Rock. What a brilliantly crafted show, so cleverly written. Writer Tina Fey, who brought you Mean Girls and all the funny SNL skits has been writing this for a few years now, and it's amazing. She's amazing. 'I want to go to there'. Wife that bitch. Shut it down.

Anyway, since I attempted my first proper script for a short film a few months ago, I've discovered the joys of reading scripts. Obviously I enjoy watching the show more to see how the actor delivers the line, but reading the script you get a better feeling of how the line was intended to be said. The Writers Strike of a few years back still didn't do enough. Next time you watch a show check the credits to see who wrote it, and see if you remember them. Sure, the actors are brilliant in television series' these days (see Breaking Bad, Dexter, How I Met Your Mother), but give some credit to the writer, who probably slaved away making sure your favourite show was perfect.

If you're interested, here is my script I wrote for a short film. It's called Ghost, and I think it's pretty funny (then again I think I'm always funny) and I hope you do too.

Ghost

have you met miss jones?

Sorry about the title, I couldn't resist. Anyway, in my first post I promised I would share the work of some of my friends, and I'll start with the blog of my good friend Penelope. I've always had a bit of a writers crush on Penelope, she writes in the style I've always wished I could pull off. Here's an excerpt from her latest post to get you interested:

'I’ve forgotten why I write, or want to be a writer. And it’s not about the marks, or the applause from family/friends/world. I write because it’s my calling, because of the joy and creativity that comes from writing, and because I love it.'

The best thing about it is that it really makes me want to get up and do something. She makes me remember that I'm in control of my own life, so there's no excuse for me to sit around and wait for something to happen.

'Today, I am going to dedicate myself to living my values. I will think loving thoughts and focus on happiness. I will see the lesson and the blessing in all that happens to me, and be open to opportunity. When I get squeezed today, I promise myself that love will be what flows out.'

The blog.

run

Whenever I need to find myself some motivation to write, I always find it helpful to go for a run. Running not your thing? Don't worry, it's not mine either, I promise. But when I actually stop complaining about it and get up and do it, it's excellent. Endorphins are the shit, a kind of morphine that is naturally injected into your body during exercise and other activities like eating spicy food, being in love and having an orgasm. Sounds like going for a run is a pretty good idea yeah? But there's more!

The best thing about running (or walking, for that matter) is that it clears your head. There's something very meditative about going for a run. Not on a treadmill in a gym, but through a park or along the beach, somewhere where the air is fresh and can cleanse your body. I think half the ideas I have about my writing are come up with on a run. And there's a way you can specify exactly what you think about without actually thinking... does that make sense? Let me reword it. There's a way you can still let the mediative aspect work, and let you subconscious tick along, but force it into thinking about a certain mood. Use music. I will always run with my iPod, it helps me completely escape into my head while I'm exercising. I've used classical music to help brainstorm ideas, but when I run I love listening to this:

Something epic!

How moving...

Thanks to Miss Canada Clements for helping my discover those tracks.

Now obviously I've just focused on huge sounds like this, and that's good for fiction; fantasy and adventure, but I have lots of different sounds to help me get in the mood and to get my imagination flowing. So give it a go! Get out and run or walk around a park, listening to something that will get you thinking.

I'll leave you with this, it's not really something to listen to when you run, but I'll come back to how CocoRosie helped me another time. Give some of their other songs a listen to, if you're game.

Candy Land

there's a light over at the frankenstein place

Janet?! Dr. Scott?! Janet?! Brad?! Rocky...?

I don't know where to start. Maybe I'll just say Richard O'Brien is genius and leave it at that. I would if I could, but I need to explain why The Rocky Horror Picture Show is so good, and why The Rocky Horror Glee Show was so terrible (like it even needs to be said). 

That's Dr. Frank-N-Furter,the complete star of the show, played by the amazing Tim Curry. Those of you who didn't know, Tim Curry was the jerk from the hotel in Home Alone 2, the voice of Nigel Thornberry and even played IT in Steven King's movie adaption of, well, IT, obviously. Tim Curry is the most talented person ever, which is saying something seeing as also in the cast is Meat Loaf as Eddie and Susan Sarandon as Janet. 

I honestly don't know how the film of musical production ever even got off the ground. I wish I could be there watching Richard O'Brien (who played Riff Raff in the original British Stage show and in the Film)  pitch it, in my head it goes like this: 

'So this newly engaged couple, right, get a flat tyre by a mansion, which it turns out is filled with a crazy transvestite who is making the 'perfect man' from scratch, and it's all going well until the dead ex-boyfriend comes out of the freezer. So he kills him and later eats him. And oh yeah the couple get corrupted in there sometime too and everyone gets turned to statues and then back to people ad they put on a show all in fishnets and corsets and the swim in the pool and then the house flies off into space.' I guess in show-biz it really is who you know (not that Richard O'Brien doesn't know what he's doing)

For all of you who have never seen it I suggest the your first time as Rocky Horror 'virgins' that you go and watch the film in a theatre. For you Melburnians, I know the Astor Theatre plays in every now and then (and if you do go look out for me there!) The deal with seeing it live is, you have to dress up like transvestites. And when the Time Warp comes on you have to dance. And everytime the name Janet is said you have to scream out 'SLUT' and every time the name Brad is said you have to shout 'ASSHOLE'. And when it's raining you have to cover your head with newspaper, and at the party scene you need a party hat. Also, bring some toast for when Frank says 'A toast!', so you can throw is at the screen. It's actually the most fun I've ever had in my life.

I think if anything, the lyrics from Fanfare/Don't Dream it, be it speaks for the show:

'Give yourself over to absolute pleasure

Swim the warm waters of sins of the flesh

Erotic nightmares beyond any measure 

And sensual day dreams to treasure forever'

I hope I didn't ramble too much, I feel I could go on forever. If you didn't read or couldn't be bothered, I'll let this Sweet Transvestite speak from him/herself